When Child Contact Centres are put forward as an option in mediation for re-establishing contact between a parent and a child, the parents tend to either react negatively or they seize the opportunity to see their child and don’t care if the contact takes place on the moon!

Those parents who react with dismay at going to a supported contact centre (supervised contact centres are different – referrals are usually made by the Court/CAFCASS or Local Authority) do so because they believe it’s unnecessary or that the other parent is being obstructive. I’ve also had clients whose perception of contact centres were similar to that of a prison nursery with a few cuddly toys thrown in. These clients believe the aim of the contact centre staff is to report back any inadequacies in their parenting to the court/solicitor/mediator/ other parent.

Or there is the scenario where the parent with residency refuses to let their child go to a contact centre because they don’t want them associating with the offspring of criminals, drug addicts and unfit parents (yes really – this was actually said to me in a shuttle mediation)

I used to volunteer at a contact centre before I became a mediator. I found that my experience helped me to explain to mediating parents what they could expect from the centre, their procedures and even the layout of the building. I could tell them the name of the co-ordinator, how many volunteers there were and that they served free tea and cake half way through the session. Providing this information dispelled the myths and stigma associated with contact centres and reassured parents that they were in fact places of warmth, safety and neutrality.

I would urge all family mediators to visit their local contact centre when a session is taking place (make sure you contact the co-ordinator beforehand). The first thing you will notice is the atmosphere – its buzzing with the energy of happy children and happy parents. There are more toys and games than Hamleys and enough activities to give professional crèches a run for their money. The helpful smiley volunteers move about unobtrusively without clipboards and covert agendas. Everything is about the child here.

Unfortunately Contact Centres have suffered as a result of the introduction of LAPSO. Like mediation providers, the lack of solicitor referrals had a detrimental impact which resulted in centres closing. Most parents don’t know the centres exist and most don’t realise they can self-refer (as long as both parents are in agreement) Two thirds of contact centres do not charge for their services and those that do, usually charge a small one off payment to cover administration costs.

The centres run on the generosity of volunteers and co-ordinators.The reason the volunteers give up their free weekend time is because they passionately believe that children have a right to a relationship with both parents after separation or divorce and believe in providing parents with an opportunity to see their children, whether they take up this opportunity or not. I believe that they are truly the unsung unpaid heroes and heroines in child disputes and deserve far more respect and recognition than they currently get.

So please support the existence of contact centres by finding out more about the one if your area. Spread the word amongst your professional network about the valuable work they do. Tell parents that they aren’t institutions of fear or mistrust but are places of support and understanding where the safety and needs of the child always always comes first.

For more information about Child Contact Centres please visit www.naccc.org.uk or you can call their information line on 0151 0115 948 4557.

For help from one of our mediators please contact Pippa Bassett on 01392-848482

Pippa Bassett, Law Society & Legal Aid Accredited Family Mediator
Professional Practice Consultant
Member of UK College of Mediators

Family & Community Mediator,
Compass Resolution

01392-848482 or 07909 440853.

www.compass-resolution.com