After the intensity of the shock and anger comes the slow tide of depression as it washes over an exhausted mind.

I will keep the part about depression short because I feel depressed thinking about it and it is not a stage to dwell on but, like the other feelings, it needs to be recognised and understood before being dealt with.

As I said earlier depression has the tendency to take hold. It can be hard to shake. You have heard it said that; “misery loves company”. Misery searches out misery so that it feels comfortable.

When we feel down in the dumps the last thing we often want is someone to throw down a life line to drag us out of the pit, preferring them to jump down with us. We don’t want empathy, we want sympathy but what we actually need is empathy, acknowledgement and positive support.

What misery needs is a good shake and the positive antidote of perspective. Yes, you have been burgled and yes you are going through separation but there is still a future.

I am always cautious of using clichés but it is true that, so often we cannot control what happens to us but we can decide how we respond to these events, how we think about them, feel and react to them.

I am not saying that this is easy in the slightest but it is still a choice. Some of us need more support than others but positive and constructive support is there if you choose to accept and work with it.